When we were on our roadtrip, I noticed myself feeling guilty for not writing – or not writing ’enough’. I had the growing sensation of degradation, how my writing muscles got weaker by each day and I lost ‘the touch’.
However, when I started counting together the words I had written during our four months of travel, I was surprised by how much I had managed to write.
This made me think of how unnecessary it was for me to feel guilty about ‘not writing’ – and how I could counteract that guilt.
The Cure For Writer’s Guilt
Our brains play tricks on us. Sometimes it makes us think we did something that we did not – from sending text messages or saying thank you to the bus driver to thinking we ate healthy this week although we went out for burgers or pizza at least three times that week.
And sometimes our brains make us think we haven’t done anything, although we have: we forget that walking from place to place is actually exercise, or that just because we don’t tick everything from our to do -list doesn’t mean we didn’t accomplish anything that day.
The latter describes the tricks my brain does to me.
But I’m cleverer than that – and therefore, half-way October, I started tracking my writing. The tracker has been a very basic, pen-on-paper kind of tracker where I’ve written down the date, what I wrote and how many words. Now, I would like to share my writing progress with you.
‘The Writerly Update’ will become a monthly series on this blog where I can show and share with you what I write and how I feel about writing – you could even think of it as a writer’s diary. But most importantly, in addition to sharing my writing with you I’m also sharing it with myself. This way, I’ll keep myself updated on my own writing and can also reflect on my projects.
So, I present to you: The Writerly Update for November 2019!
The Great Statistics
For November, the goal was simply to get back to my writing routines, to my almost-daily writing. I decided upon this goal because my writing routines have practically been non-existent during our travels, and I was quite certain it would take getting used to active writing routines again.
My writing routines back home were more or less daily the following: in the morning, before breakfast, I would journal for two pages. After breakfast, with my morning coffee, I would start writing. Most often, I aimed for 1,000 words per day – sometimes I wrote more, rarely less.
However, November wasn’t maybe the optimal month for trying to get back to the routines mentioned above. During this month, I’ve still been on the road, I’ve sold a car, travelled to another country, figured out a bus card, bank account and tax number for myself – in addition to working at a farm five hours a day for a week.
But I’ve still managed to write something because it was a promise I made for myself (and for this blog). So, let’s see some statistics:
Days writing and/or journaling: 17 days out of 30
Word count in total (excluding journaling): 12,960 words
Texts published: one fictional + four blog posts
Comments on other people’s texts: 15
In other words, 56% of the month was spent writing and, even though my word count isn’t anywhere near the brave Nanowrimo-writers’, I’m happy for my 12,960 words. My lowest word count for the day was 200 words and the highest 2,500.
What I Wrote This Month
The projects I worked on this month were mainly fan fiction.
I planned and wrote a story of 5,000 words in total, divided into three parts. Two of the parts are already live on the writing forum and the third part will be published next week’s Thursday. This piece was a challenge because the narrator was first-person rather than third which I’m more used to. The story was also written from the perspective of a rather wicked male character – my characters tend to be female and, well, nice.
However, after trying out different narrators, it really felt like first-person worked better than third-person – I believe it gave this specific main character more depth and showed his personality better than a third-person description would have. Nevertheless, it required some effort to finish the story and some courage to actually publish it.
I’m still fairly uncertain why I wrote the story but at least I got some good exercise out of it. Maybe next time I’ll feel more comfortable switching to first-person narrative and don’t find it as challenging to write more evil characters.
The other story I’ve been working on is a story with 24 parts, all of them flash fiction with a word count between 100 and 300 words per part. With this story, it’s not the characters or the narrative that are challenging (the characters are familiar to me from my previous works and I’m going for third-person narrative written in present tense, my favorite), but rather the theme and genre of the story.
It’s a genre called hurt/comfort and is defined as following on Wikipedia: “A story in which a character is put through a traumatizing experience in order to be comforted. The ultimate goal of these stories is often to allow for close examination of two characters’ bond with one another – –”.
And even though for me, the hurt-part of the story is clear and even the comfort of it, I feel like I’m struggling with the words to create the right kind of mood for the story. It’s hard to say if I’m doing it wrong or right or something in-between but I intend to publish it during December so we’ll see how the readers will find it!
Summing Up November
Considering that November was the first month of getting back on track with my writing, I’d say I did fairly well. Life got in the way on many days but still, I managed to write at least every other day of the month, resulting in a good total of 12,960 words. I also commented on 15 short stories/chapters to novels I’ve read online, which I consider as a good total for the month.
The projects I’ve worked on have had their challenges but at the same time, I’ve learned something new from them and tried writing something different than what I’m used to. It’s easy to write about what you know and therefore I’m happy I’m putting myself on the discomfort zone – and still having the courage to publish my texts!
The goal for December is to keep on with the good work and aim for writing five to six days a week. I won’t get all too excited and start dictating a daily word count quite yet, but we’ll see what and how much I write when I try to get back to almost-daily writing. My goal is also to publish the 24-part hurt/comfort online and get back to writing my longer fan fiction story.
And that was it! The next Writerly Update will be in the end of December/early January so we’ll see how I managed my goals for the last month of the year (!).
What have you been working on? Do you keep track of your writing?